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I can't believe he's really never going to be here again. I can't believe that I won't see him in the mornings I wake up...forever. I can't believe he's not going to be here to hold me or kiss me or say that he loves me. I am so heartbroken. My heart is aching. God..I just don't understand. I may never understand. I believe in you and your plan, but I am just so broken right now. Lift me up please Lord. Carry me through this. I am so lost.