Not Quite Ready

I am just not quite ready to face the crowds/questions at church. I love seeing friends and family, but some things, I'm just not yet prepared for. So, instead, I spent the morning organizing my bedroom. It's the first time I've cleaned/organized since Kevin's passing, and it was very difficult. I took all of his clothes and put them in some totes in my closet. I'm not ready to take things off the hangers yet, or see anything go. I feel like there's still a piece of him in those clothes yet. It's just so hard to do things like this, to see things of his that just remind me more that he's not here.

Some days are tough, and today is one of them. This afternoon, I have a family thanksgiving to go to. It's going to be my first family gathering since Kevin's passing, and my first holiday since. I can't imagine how hard this holiday is going to be, nor do I want to. One minute at a time, and keeping myself surrounded by families and friends is so important.

Today is just a sad day for me...I miss him so much.