Life - Brenda Lee Free (Page 15)

Life

A collection of 530 posts

Grieving Ain't Done

Last night I took my first step into OFFICIAL grief therapy and went to Griefshare. http://www.griefshare.org/ Greifshare meets at local churches/community centers to bring people together who share one thing: grief. It's a 13 week course on working through your grief, developing skills and

Finding Time

I am having a hard time finding time to give to others. I'm trying my best to be relatable again-to not just be a "widow" but to carry the former spirit of Brenda with me in this new life journey. However, finding time, and the strength,

Envy?

I have not envied myself in well over a year. It was a line I typed today-one of those "wow" lines. I've lost a lot, learned much, succeeded little it feels like, and am back in a "normal" life admist abnormal circumstances. Not exactly

Worst Morning Ever?

I thought this morning, as I woke up and put my contacts in and my eyes immediatelly throbbied and watered so I took them out, and my phone didn't charge right last night, and every pore in my body burns, this is the worse morning ever. Well, not

No Shoes, No Shirt, No problems.

Ok, so I HAVE TO wear a shirt, I understand that society does require that of me. But the no shoes and no problems, well, I want to embrace that since I love soaking up life in bear feet without feeling the world on my shoulders. Life is busy for

Nouveau Vie

Life New. New Life. Whichever you choose to phrase it, that's where I'm heading, what I'm in, how I'm existing. This month, I believe, is a month of huge new firsts. I hope to be purchasing a different vehicle in the next

Angiosarcoma 1 Year

http://www.theboitsons.info/?p=126 I don't know what possessed me to see what was happening a year ago...but something did. Today marks the official 1 year anniversary since I first heard the words angiosarcoma. Check out the post from a year ago......optimism. Guess it&

Feel

Some people say they can feel those who have past-their spirit, but I don't. I've discussed this with another widow and we both agree that never have we truly felt our late husband's presence over us. We can hear their voices and know exactly

Locked Doors...a year later

This devotion was posted exactly a year ago on our blog: My devotional that is very fitting…http://www.upperroom.org/devotional The Locked Gate Read Matthew 7:7-14 To him who by the power at work within us is able to accomplish abundantly far more than all we can

Toronto Here I come!

I leave for Toronto to see Kevin's family tomorrow after work. I'll be away until Tuesday. Wish me safe travels and good times....

9 Months

9 Months. It's hard to believe that in just 3 very short months it will be a full year. I'll have passed all those firsts. Right now I'm in the midst of passing all the things last year that were so painful, so uncertain,

Life in Threes

Last week, the jeep decided it wasn't worthy enough to pass inspection, nor was it worthy enough to fix. Today, my hairdryer blew. Just now, I found out that not only Canada has taxed me on a benefit check, but so will the US at the end of

A Year Ago Today:

1 Year ago, this is what was happening in the boitsons' lives: July 22 Thoughts-Waiting Author: brenda I walked into that waiting room thinking, “More time off of work…I hope they find out what is causing my husband so much pain…let’s treat it and get on

Love to Judge or Judge to Love?

Growing up conservatively, I've been exposed to a lot of judgement, a lot of love, and a lot of the combination. I am not going to get into any religious, moral high grounds on here, but I do want to talk about Judgment versus Love and how exposed

The Age of Innocence

I am part of the age of innocence without being able to embrace it. I don't feel I'm blind to anything in my life now, but alternately, acutely aware of how raw life is in all its sins and shame and devastation. It is a raw

Caretaker Guilt

I've talked about this with other caretaker's in my group grief therapy and being a caretaker carries a lot of guilt. You never feel as if you are or have given enough, the things you do you feel don't help as much as they

Things that SUCK about Widowhood

As I've repeated often, the transfer from single woman, to married woman, to widow, has not been an easy one, but the latter is by far the hardest transition of my life. There are things in our marriage that I think, wow, I took advantage of having that,

PODCASTING!!

If you have windows media player, click this link to see my first podcast all for YOU! Video@2009_0713_222144

Stuck

I definitely feel stuck. It's different than before. While at 6 months I felt in a grief coma, at almost 8.5 months I just feel stuck in grief. I see others who are widows moving forward, meeting people, dating, trying new things. I'm a bit

"Normal"

I work, I pay my bills (sometimes, hehe), I have a car, I plan things with friends and family, I go through the motions of a seemingly normal life. People who don't know me, probably see my life as pretty normal. It's not though, and as

The Journal

I look at this blog as my journal, but recently I've begun using a journal that was given me after Kevin's passing by Thomas & Jackie H. To be honest-I don't know if I've ever met this in person, maybe I have.

Rest....

I am around..was away at the cabin with my parents this weekend. I have TONS of thoughts to blog upon, but for now, I'm just exhausted. Pray I get some good sleep as I haven't been sleeping well. I promise, when I have time to

Missing

Grief is overwhelming. You never know when it's going to trample your day from out of nowhere, or your week, or your month, or your life. It consumes and barely lets you breathe at times. I feel confused about grief. None of it feels normal, I can'

Happy Canada Day!

Happy Canada Day to all my dear Canadian friends and family. This day last year is amongst the many that hold a tough memory for me as we enjoyed what would be one of the last few nights Kevin and I even slept in the same bed together before he

Happiness

I gotta find happiness on my own before I can give it to anyone else. Going on a few dates was a COMPLETE failure. Back to single widowhood, and I am A-OK with that. The thought of being independent and doing my life was much more appealing than trying to